I.AM.A.DUMBASS.

Yeah.

Today Corey and I went to my classroom to get it ready for my summer school kiddos. We drove through and got lunch and took it into my room. I put down my purse and everything else in my hands. He went out to unload some stuff from my car and I (being the good natured helper that I am) followed him out the door. CRAP.

The door locked behind me. So there we were. Staring into my classroom looking at the keys on my desk. CRAP.

Luckily, he had his cell phone and his car keys in his pocket, so we were eventually able to locate a fellow teacher who came and let us in the building. BUT, I still couldn't get in my classroom. CRAP.

We trolled through the school (thank GOD the alarm wasn't on) and looked in the janitor's office for keys. We found some, but unfortunately, they didn't work. CRAP.

I ended up having to call my assistant principal and he came over and let us in. WHEW.

I owe him big time!

So after that, we were able to FINALLY eat our cold lunch and finish up the work we had come to do.

Yeah. I'll be getting several copies of that key made tomorrow...

Monthly Dinner Menu: June

Please leave feedback...is my posting these menus helping anyone?

Go Fly a Kite!

Today, Corey and I went on a LONG exhausting search for a kite. We started at Toys R Us. They were basically sold out of the cheap ones so we went over to Target. They had PLENTY, but Corey decided there were better ones at Wal-Mart and he'd rather have one there. So, off we went to Wally World. He came back empty handed. Then, off to Hobby World, which is supposed to be open until 5:00, but they decided to close at 3:00. Then, off to Hobby Lobby. No kites. Soooo, back to Target. Ugh. Finally we got to the park and stayed about an hour. There were a couple of other folks out there flying their kites, too. It was beautiful outside! Here are some photos of our fun day:

And here are a couple of videos of us trying to keep the kite up!

Monthly Dinner Menu

Corey and I have been planning monthly dinner menus since October of last year. It was an idea I stole from my friend, Clarissa. We plan for each night except Saturdays because we will usually eat out at least one night a week. For the most part, it works pretty well. There are some nights, though, where something at school will come up and we have to re-adjust things or we just don't feel like eating what's on the menu for the night. In that case, we just shift the meals around. There is always PLENTY of food! I usually end up taking leftovers to school the next day for lunch, so it works out well.

I downloaded a Power Point calendar template from Microsoft and each month, I just open it up and type in what we are going to have. I usually scour the web looking for recipes and other people's menus. I figured posting mine might help somebody out...let me know if you have any questions or comments!!

I Designed a Bag!

Kroger is having a contest for people to design a "green" bag. This was my design...



What do you think?

American Idol SUCKS!

Ok, am I the only person who feels like American Idol is really not living up to their end of the deal? What the hell kind of themes are they expecting us to watch? Mariah Carey? Neil Diamond? Dolly Parton? Andrew Lloyd Webber???? While I agree, all of those performers have definitely etched their way into the music history books, do people really want to listen to them now? The demographic for AI is probably
15-25, so you can't tell me that the above mentioned artists are current and popular with that demographic. And when did Mariah Carey stop singing? All she does now is ooh and ahh and touch herself on stage. Puh-leese.

Anyway...AI is complaining about their ratings being so low lately and they are even looking for ways to re-invent it for next season! Um, HELLOOOOOOOOO...LET THEM SING CONTEMPORARY SONGS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, they probably ARE in fact, the most talented group ever, but I'm not so sure we'll ever get to see that talent to the fullest extent because they keep picking crappy genres for them to choose crappy songs!

I'm frustrated with this season. If I had known it was going to suck this hard, I would have never invested all this time in it...

And can we just take a minute to discuss the fact that Paula Abdul must have been smoking crack this evening? She was commenting on David Cook's second song before he even performed it! KooKooBird!

Here's my breakdown of what I think about the remaining 5 "Idols":

David Archuleta - You are a robot. Grow some bolts and quit singing the songs your dad picks!

Brooke White - I wish she had a range. Brooke is great, but she tends to stay in the safe zone. Get out!

Syesha Mercado - You are NOT Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, or Celine Dion. Please stop thinking you are.

Jason Castro - I'm over the dred-locked John Travolta look-alike. Lay off the 420.

David Cook - David probably deserves to win this the most. At least he can take these BORING songs and breathe new life into them.

And there you have it folks. I just needed to get that off my chest. You may now return to your regularly scheduled programs...

SKUNKED!!!

OH.MY.GOSH.

Last night, while watching the Idols get kicked off, I noticed a PUTRID odor coming into my house. It kept getting worse and worse. So bad, that I RAN (and ya'll KNOW I don't run) into the kitchen gagging! Apparently, a skunk had been in our yard and it got spooked and we all know what happens then...So, my ENTIRE house was enveloped in skunk stink! Thank God my nose has been stuffed for the past week and I couldn't smell it to the fullest extreme because we would have probably spent the night at the nearest hotel!

Today when I came home, it was still really bad. So, I opened all the windows in the house and sprayed Febreeze and Oust all over everything. My poor Coach bag even stinks! Anyway, I read online to deskunk a house you should boil vinegar and lay out coffee grounds in each room and it will neutralize the odor. I have to say, it has done wonders for the stench! We can still smell it, but it isn't NEARLY as bad as it was!!!

So, if anyone reading has any suggestions (and no, tomato juice does not work) please share them with us. I think this is quite possibly the grossest thing to ever befall my home! Ugh...


For such a cute animal it sure makes the vomit hit the back of my throat!

Quick Update...

Today, during our 4th grade field trip to the Hermitage, a representative from ULTA called my cell phone. She said all she needed was my address and they would ship my reward points card to me within 7-10 days. She also apologized profusely for my inconvienience.

So, they have 7-10 days to make me a happy customer again. I'll update you when I get my rewards and let you know what I get with it! :-)

Until then...

ULTA is NOT my favorite place right now...

Dear ULTA,

I have been a loyal customer of yours since you opened a store in Murfreesboro, TN back in October '07. On your grand opening day, I filled out your reward club card and dropped it in the box by the nice lady who asked me to fill it out. Since then, I have spent approximately $300-$400 on merchandise in your store and have YET to receive ANY of the benefits you promise to your loyal customers for spending their hard earned money at your store.

Yesterday, when I purchased $20 worth of merchandise and mentioned this fact to one of your employees, she looked up my customer number and apparently my information had never been turned in. I was given a card with your customer service number on it and was deferred to your customer service center instead of a manager at the store, so as instructed I came home and promptly phoned your customer service center.

In the past 24 hours, I have been on hold with your "customer service" department for a total of 45 minutes. Currently, I have been on hold for 21 minutes and counting. I have left TWO messages with your phone service with TWO contact numbers. Of course, I was contacted during a time that was well over 12 hours after my original message (is that REALLY your earliest convenience?) and I was not home. Did your customer service team bother to call my other contact number? Of course not! So, I'm back on the phone again.

ULTA, this is a SORRY excuse for good customer service. I am VERY dissatisfied with your company at this point. You must only have a total of three people working at your customer service center, which is evident by the current wait time of 26 minutes I am experiencing. There are companies twice as small as yours who would KILL to demonstrate better customer service.

Please be advised I will be posting this message on my personal blog as an open letter to my readers. Surely you know that word of mouth is the best promotion, so it is within your best interest to right this wrong as soon as possible.

Lastly, I am hoping this situation will be rectified soon and that you will honor the points I have built through your club since your store opened here. I am enclosing my Club number along with TWO contact numbers, in which I'm hoping you will use.

Sincerely,

Stephanie Smith (still holding after 40 minutes)
xxx-xxx-xxxx
xxx-xxx-xxxx

Club Number xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Have You Ever Wondered What $250 Worth of M&Ms Looked Like?

For the past two years in Rutherford County, we have had a teacher recruitment fair so all the graduating teachers, or those shopping for new jobs, can meet with the principals and some of the faculty from all of the area schools. This will be the second time I have represented my school. Last year, being the first, no one really knew what to expect as far as how to set up the booths and promote our schools. This year we'll be better prepared (as will all the other schools, I'm sure!)

We decided to order some M&Ms as give-aways. We got one 5 lb bag of dark green and one 5 lb bag of gold and 4 little bags of white logo M&Ms. Yesterday, Clarissa and I spent MUCH of the afternoon bagging them (100 bags - 2500 M&Ms total - and we didn't even use HALF the order) tying a cute litte ribbon around the bag and attaching our principal's business card by punching a paw print through it (since we're the wildcats.)

I think they turned out GREAT!


Now the next order of business is to complete the school's power point. The one we used last year is pretty much unusable since many of the people pictured on it don't work at our school anymore due to the new school they built last year. Our school was very crowded, so the new school was built to help with the overflow and half of our staff went there with half of our students. We still love most of them though! lol

The recruitment fair is on the 26th, so we still have a couple of weeks to work out the kinks and be prepared. I'm excited! I love to talk to people, so this is right up my alley! Clarissa will be joining me, so I'm sure we'll work up all kinds of trouble! It'll be good times!

Oh, no they dih-unt!

Where is Richard Simmons when I need him?

I am SOOO ready to head back to school. I can't take this Spring Break stuff much longer. I'm going to go insane! I swear I think I've gained a gazillion-trillion pounds this week because I've been on NO schedule whatsoever! I've eaten at McAllister's, Chop House, McDonald's, Hardee's, Sonic, P.F.Chang's, TGI Friday's, Marble Slab, Jason's Deli, Macaroni Grill, Pei Wei's, and Olive Garden - just to name a few. AND on top of that, Corey and I have raided the discounted Easter candy isles and eaten our weight in Mounds & Reese Eggs. Oh, and the Cadbury ones, too.


Please send Richard to my house if you see him. Let him know he needs to help me Sweat to the Oldies - except I hate to sweat! I see NO point in getting ready and putting on clean "special" work-out clothes just to go get dirty and need a shower all over again.

Oooh, and I saw my "Bestest" friend last week when I went to get my strep test. You know, the dietitian...she saw me and said, "Oh, I didn't expect to see you here!" Puh-leeze. She's scared of me. I know it. She is...she was afraid I was coming to fondle her rubber chicken cutlets again.

Sorry, I got off my topic. Please forgive me. Anyway - I'm a lard ass and I need someone to come and staple my mouth shut, lock my fridge, and put alarms on my pantry.

I can't wait to go back to school...

Morning Tongue

This might just edge out the "Cootie Queen" commercial...be prepared to pee yourself.

Hey - It's Spring Break! Let's Get Strep!

Soooo, I started off the week just fine. Felt GREAT on Monday and was excited about the week because I knew I only had FOUR days to go until Spring Break. A teacher friend was very sickly on Monday and I made her go home. She could barely hold her head up, so I helped her get her stuff ready for a sub. and sent her home to get rest. She came back on Tuesday and we could all tell she felt much better!

By Tuesday, I noticed my throat was getting a little sore, but I just figured it was due to the spring-like weather and the sinus infection that usually accompanies any weather change.After school, I had to go over to MTSU and serve as a panelist on the NSTA student chapter forum. You see, I actually DID do something smart and nerdy at college because I was the founding president of the National Science Teachers Assoc. Student Chapter at Middle TN State Univ. (NSTA-SC @ MTSU) Whew! So I went to speak about what it has been like transferring from the university life to the actual teaching industry and the challenges and rewards that come with it.

That evening, my throat felt worseand I kept checking my temperature, but I was still as "normal" as I could be. I had even stopped by our school nurse's office before leaving for the meeting to have her look at it. She didn't seem to be worried. After I got home from the meeting, I could NOT keep my head up. I was so deliriously tired that I kept slurring my words. Corey even asked me if I was OK. So, I ended up in bed by 7:00.

Wednesday, my throat hurt, but I was still deliriously tired, so I went to school to get things ready for a substitute. Luckily, we had a field trip to the local high school to watch a play, so all I had to do was get together a bit of busy work to occupy time between when they got back and went home. After I got home I slept for FIVE hours! My throat still was hurting, but not too much. I felt better after the rest and several of my friends called to check on me to make sure I was still alive. I secretly think they were just wishing they would inherit my super sweet-ass Element!

Well, that brings us to Thursday. The last day of the week...I woke up and my throat was on

! My school nurse made me an appointment at the CareHere clinic for 3:00, so I spent the day showering myself in Green Chloroseptic spray to numb the pain. I managed to make it through the day and went to the Dr. at 3:00. Her diagnosis - STREP THROAT! Ugh. I didn't have ANY of the usual signs other than a red swollen throat that usually accompany strep. Other than that, I felt great! She gave me a shot of penicillin and a prescription for Corey and me for a Z-Pack.

Corey and I went to dinner that night with school friends for a fundraiser and went shopping at Target afterward. He suggested I try Breathe Right Strips since my nose had been stuffy through all this and I've been resigned to being a mouth breather. Well, let me tell you that those things kick major ass! It was the first night I've been able to breathe all week!

So, kids. I guess the moral of this long and boring blog is - strep doesn't always appear as you think it would. And, it hurts like hell.

Have a Happy Easter! Eat some bunny ears for me since I can't swallow anything!

MeMe

Alison tagged me with the Meme challenge. Here are the meme rules: 1. Write your own six word memoir. 2. Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you’d like. 3. Link to the person that tagged you in your post and to this original post if possible, so we can track it as it travels across the blogosphere. 4. Tag five more blogs with links5. Remember to leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play!
Here is mine:
Loving life more every single day!!

Now the hard part:Tag you are it!!!

Stephanie needs Spring Break RIGHT now!

Tagged:
Clarissa
Dusty
Jennifer
KT - use your myspace girlies!
Bell

And the snow fell!

We ended up getting between 1 - 3 inches of snow overnight. It was so pretty, but it's a shame it was wasted on the weekend! I mean, we could've had TWO snow days out of this!! Anyway, here is our slideshow of the fun we had this morning!!

It's SNOWING!!

Yep, FINALLY the white stuff we've been waiting for in mass amounts is here! We're expected to get anywhere from 2 - 6 inches tonight. I'm sooooo stoked to build a snowman and make snow angels tomorrow! Luckily, I have some carrots in the fridge...

Of course, it is COMPLETELY ironic that it is snowing on a Friday night instead of giving me a snow day from my much loved, but I can ditch for a snow day fourth graders!! However, we did get an early dismissal today so we could aviod the storm. Well, it's 10:30 currently and it JUST now started snowing here, so they kinda jumped the gun!

I will try to post pictures tomorrow of my awesome snowman and me making snow angels!

Whoo Hoo!

"Who you callin' a cootie queen, you lint licker?!"

Ok, this is my ALL TIME favorite commercial! I go around and quote it constantly. I can't stop myself! Anyway, Clarissa has never seen it, so this is for you, girlie!
Sooo hilarious!

Snow Day!

Today was our second snow day of the year! The last one was earlier this month, but I was lying on my death bed and couldn't enjoy it at ALL! Boooo! However, today I woke up at my usual 5:00 AM and flipped on the TV to notice my lover, Lelan Statom was giving the morning weather report. He said we were OUT! So, I got up and made my teacher friend phone calls to report the news. Then I went back to bed and slept until about 9:00.

My friend, Clarissa, her daughter Caraline, and I went to O'Charley's for lunch. The food was OK. I ordered soup and salad. My salad was great, but the potato cheese soup there is just gross. Does anybody else think they just cut up a raw potato and pour nacho cheese sauce over it and call it a day? Ick. I ate it anyway. Clarissa's meal was also pretty crappy. She got soup and a 1/2 club sandwich. I SWEAR to you the sandwich had a CORNER of a piece of cheese and not even a quarter of a piece of bacon on it. She sent it back. Our waiter took it to the kitchen and they put more bacon and cheese on top of the mess that was already there. I'm sure they added a few pubes to it while they were at it! Haven't you seen "Waiting?"

I came home after that and now I'm watching "Days of Our Lives." Why do they only bring back Kim when somebody dies? Patsy Pease is a good actress - give her a damn permanent job! She needs to be back with Shane so they can be involved with the ISA and have that secret control room in their house again! That was awesome!!

It has been snowing ALL day here and has not amounted to SQUAT! Hopefully, it will still snow after dark and stick. I think we need to call Mr. Gill and plead with him to give us ONE more day off!! Who's with me?!

That's my post. Deal with it! :-)

Sick...ugh...

Hi! I'm writing tonight feeling like total crap! I had a sinus thing this past weekend, but really didn't think much of it since I have sinus issues frequently. On Monday I went to school and felt pretty good, but when I was on my way Tuesday, my sinuses started to drain and I thought maybe my allergies were acting up. Throughout the day on Tuesday I started feeling worse and worse - I was having to open the back door in my classroom to go and get air. I took my temp. at school and it was normal, but I felt like I was burning up! By the time I got home Tuesday night, I knew I was sick and was dealing with much more than a sinus infection. I went ahead and scheduled a sub. and made a Dr. appt. for Wednesday afternoon.

Well, as it turns out, we got out of school for a snow day on Wednesday, but I didn't even get to enjoy it! Dammit. By the time my 1:00 Dr. appt. rolled around, I thought I was knocking on death's door. Seriously. My head was so hot I thought my eyeballs were going to catch on fire! The dr. told me that my temp was 100.4 and that I was 2 days away from getting pneumonia! Sooo, I got a nice PAINFUL shot in my derriere and several perscriptions for antibiotics, cough syrups, decongestants, etc..

I called a sub for Thursday as well and felt even WORSE today! My temp got up to 101.7 and I really thought I was going to pass out and Corey was going to find me dead in the floor when he got home from work. I went all day either freezing or burning up. At one point I got so hot that my vision started to blur. Ugh. All day I had a miserably, painful, deep-chested cough that didn't produce much but pain. All the muscles in my back and my abdomen have never hurt so bad! And everytime I coughed, it felt like tiny elves were taking pick-axes to my lungs! Ouch!

As of 8:00 tonight I am feeling better. My fever has gone down and I haven't had a coughing spell in about 5 or so hours. AND...here's the BIG part - I can breathe through ONE of my nostrils!!! I can't tell you how exciting that is! At one point I thought I was condemmed to be a mouth-breather forever!

I have called in a sub again for tomorrow, which sucks because it was supposed to be my classes' Valentine's Day party and a half day at school for the kids. But, since I'm still sporting feverish tendencies, I'm probably the last person anybody wants to sit next to. So, I'll spend tomorrow at home. Ugh.

We're supposed to head to Crossville this weekend, but I will need to work on my lesson plans at some point since I was out this week. Perhaps if I feel like it, we can head out tomorrow afternoon when Corey gets back from work. I don't know if I'll be up to it, though. Two hours in a car sounds absolutely exhausting to me right now...

I hope everyone else had a wonderful Valentine's Day. Corey brought me a Route 44 Diet Sprite from Sonic, Cheese & Cracker Combos, and Cheese Pringles. Yum! That's about all I've eaten in 3 days. Not much of an appetite. Anyway, like I said - I hope you all had a great V-Day and got lots of good chocolate and diamonds! lol